Touched by Satan

I’ve just had a rare and weird feeling.

You’ve probably read descriptions about this feeling from a number of sources, I have, and generally the descriptions are described quite well, but its quite another thing to actually have the feeling yourself, for when you have the feeling, then it becomes real. I believe people who have what’s called near death experiences could relate to that.

Anyway, some time last year I was in the cinema. I don’t know why or how, but I just kinds ‘dropped out’ from the act of watching and enjoying the movie. To call it a spiritual feeling wouldn’t be too wrong.  I kind of looked around and saw that everything was ‘fake’ an illusion almost as though it staged – or even a trap if you will. I kind of interpret it as a mercy from God – in a way, a gentle wake up call, or perhaps little reminder.

I hate it when people draw upon the movies to describe life, so I’m going to do a bit of self-hating right now because in a way, it was a bit like ‘The Truman Show’. The world wasn’t real – or rather how I was fillting and using the world wasn’t real – that is I wasn’t making use of the world as I should have been. I knew the seconds of my life were ticking by and here I was in a cinema watching a movie – wasting time. I was very aware that really I was just waiting ‘life force’ and that indeed I could and should be doing something much better. Were those EXIT signs independent of this feeling or playing a subtle kind of role?

I like to think of myself as a Muslim. As such I know the purpose of life is to worship Allah. There’s a number of ways in which one can ‘get on with life’ in worship of Allah, but watching a fantasy movie wasn’t one of them. More self-hatred coming up: In that episode of ‘The Simpsons’ where Homor has 24 hours to live (he ate a blowfish) and after surviving, he vows to change the way he lives his life only to be pictured the next day doing exactly the same as what he’s always done prior to the vow. I think he was pictured asleep at the TV with a football game blaring away in the background, and the sad thing is, that’s kind of the result of my experience.

Why am I writing this? Well, about an hour and a half agom I had that feeling again, but it was preceeded – perhaps triggered – by a bit of a shock relating to some people I know (see below) and I’m wondering if once more I’ll let it pass or will I act upon it this time?

When I think about it logically, I’m pretty certain God will throw me some tests, and I must never assume I am free of the whispers of the Iblis (the devil) – that’s a mistake I’m sure most people make. They believe they are immune to the suggestions of Iblis, or that Iblis is ‘busy’ on someone else – like iblis has the same kind of physical limitations as ourself. Oh how desparetly wrong!

Thanks be to God, my life is very comfortble. I currently know of no personal hardhsips. Right now I’m appreciating my good health; I’m pain, strain, cough and sniffle free. I’m in the comfort zone in all ways not just health, and with the reoccurance of this feeling, I’m thinking again “perhaps this is my test. Will I squander my remaining life force (again)”?

I also waste a lot of time playing two very old computer strategy games. Pure time wastage. I know that. I think from tonight I will make another effort never to play them again, but what of my other hobbies? Reading politics, history, some economics, about secret societies and so on. Where does time wasteage begin and legitimiate knowledge acquisition begin? Does it ever ‘begin’?

Blogging? almost definately a waste of time. I’ve blogged to voice out objection to horrific injustices happening in this world today, and to hear from others on the subject, but it’s achieved nothing. Either has my reading of politics and just about everything else. This is true of e-mail and just about all other modernisms. It seems like it’s all a pointless waste. I think I’m in danger of failing the test. I often want to shed this stuff off and get back to real living, even though I’m not 100% sure what real living actually is.

Now and again I feel I should ALT-F4 everything and get my heart back in spiritual tune with my Creator but again I really don’t think I’m one of those 100% religion types – if you know what I mean (I lack the words with which to describe them and I don’t mean to be derogatory)

Getting back to the Satan thing. I feel it’s important to ask “What is satan trying to make me do now”? Has that beautiful girl I just saw been thrown my way to try and tempt me into trying to get close to her etc etc? {Thankfully my resolve in that department as improved over the years, but a womans beauty is very potent indeed!} Is there a new computer game pushing it’s way into my attention so that I’ll spend weeks and weeks and weeks of my free time playing it? etc.

What of the people around me? – and this is a major contrbuting factor as to why I’m writing this post.

The study of the Dajjal and end times is something that fascinates me. It’s said 999 out of 1000 are set for the fires of hell. Islam will be split into many sects. The touch of Satan will evidently be very difficult to shake off. Islam and Muslims have been and will experience this touch. It’s ridiculous to think Freemasonry/Cabbalism hasn’t infiltrated Islam, pulling Muslims from God. Zionism/Black Pope Jesuits/Black Magic, possession by Jinn, sex, money, power etc, all ways that iblis can impart his touch and what a prize a Muslims/monotheist would be. Will/do I fall foul and become one of them? Will my friends and those I respect?

Some of those friends have today given me reason to start wondering whether this statanic corruption of Islam has actually uncovered itseld. Are some of the great Muslims, (not my friends, but about one or two steps outside my ‘friend circle’),  of who I also have a lot of respect for, actually fifth columnists? Possibilities were raisd today of links to these satanic deviations specifically freemasonry/Cabbalism (but all these secret groups lead to the same end anyway – ‘whatever it takes’ – right Iblis? I know it’s your modus operandi). Thing is, some of the these people are in my estimation, at the leading edge of Islamic resurgence. And to those spooks that read this blog, no you idiots – it’s not the phoey phantom militant Islamic resurgence, the synthetic terror you guys dreampt up, but real Islamic resurgence (come to think of it, real Islamic resurgence is exactly what your ‘upper djinn possessed bosses’ are trying to prevent ergo that synthetic terror manefestation’ – Oh well – screw you too!).

I’m quite sure all things that have happened in my life have some kind of meaning. All the people I’ve met, all the things I’ve read all the knowledge I’m accumulated, so how should I apply this to the possibilities. Is this part of my test?

I don’t know. Can I do anything about it? I don’t think so. Should I spend time on it? Maybe not – it could be yet another distraction, the ‘greater mirage’. Is it time to become more insular and just let all these time wasting things pass by and power-up my personal standing with God? I think so but perhaps I owe it to myself to check out.

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I’m not sure why I wanted to publish this. What’s it going to achieve? I think I’ve just wasted more time :(

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